Official Blackout Rugby Zimbabwe Offsite
HomeCalendarGalleryFAQSearchUsergroupsRegisterLog inBlackout Rugby

Share | 

 How to make a complaint

Go down 

Posts : 919
Points : 1261
Reputation : 20
Join date : 2010-10-01
Age : 28
Location : Cardiff, Wales
Team Name : Old But Gold

PostSubject: How to make a complaint   Mon Apr 16, 2012 12:40 am

These are extracts from actual letters sent to various councils and housing associations in the UK ...

“I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.”

“I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.”

“And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.”

“I wish to report that the tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof, I think it was that bad wind the other night that blew them off.”

“I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.”

“Will you please send someone to mend the garden path, my wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.”

“I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.”

“50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and the rest are just plan filthy.”

“The toilet is blocked an we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.”

“Will you please send a man to look at my water - it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.”

“Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.”

“I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6.00am his cock wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.”

“The man next door has a large erection in the garden which is unsightly and dangerous.”

“Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two small children and would like a third so please send someone round to do something about it.”

“I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night.”

“Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.”

“I have had the clerk of the works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.”

“My bush is really overgrown around the front and my back passage has fungus on it.”

“He’s got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can’t take it any more.”
Back to top Go down

Posts : 890
Points : 1150
Reputation : 18
Join date : 2010-09-29
Age : 32
Location : Reading
Team Name : Reading Royals

PostSubject: Re: How to make a complaint   Mon Apr 16, 2012 12:44 am

Haha, brilliant, some people are just so thick/taking the piss
Back to top Go down

Posts : 426
Points : 485
Reputation : 11
Join date : 2011-12-21
Age : 29
Location : limerick, ireland
Team Name : newcastle west

PostSubject: Re: How to make a complaint   Mon Apr 16, 2012 12:52 am

there all fucking hilarious like.
iv a friend ehos mother works with housing travellers and had a few quotes i cant remember them all but one was:
"we can live there there condemnation running down the wall"
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content

PostSubject: Re: How to make a complaint   

Back to top Go down
How to make a complaint
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
» How to make the most of your athletic profile
» Want to make San Marino gods in FM?
» RIP John Treloar - Australia's first athlete to make an Olympic 100m final
» How to make a crankbait
» awesome things to make out of bacon

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
ZimBr Official Offsite :: General Discussions-
Jump to: